UKC Forums UKC Website :: Hunting Ops :: All-Breed Sports :: Registration :: UKC Online Store
Here you can view your subscribed threads, work with private messages and edit your profile and preferences Registration is free! Calendar Find other members Frequently Asked Questions Search Home  
UKC Forums : Powered by vBulletin version 2.3.0 UKC Forums > Departments > UKC Coonhounds > Off Topic > The ranch hand
  Last Thread   Next Thread
Author
Thread Post New Thread    Post A Reply
Driftwoodblue
UKC Forum Member

Registered: Aug 2011
Location: Emporia, Kansas
Posts: 372

The ranch hand

A successful rancher died and left everything to his devoted wife.

She was a very good-looking woman and determined to keep the ranch, but knew very little about ranching, so she decided to place an ad in the newspaper for a ranch hand


Two cowboys applied for the job. One was gay and the other a drunk.

She thought long and hard about it, and when no one else applied she decided to hire the gay guy, figuring it would be safer to have him around the house.

He proved to be a hard worker who put in long hours every day and knew a lot about ranching.

For weeks, the two of them worked, and the ranch was doing very well.

Then one day, the rancher's widow said to the hired hand, "You have done a really good job, and the ranch looks great. You should go into town and kick up your heels." The hired hand readily agreed and went into town Saturday night.

One o'clock came and he didn't return. Two o'clock and no hired hand. Finally he returned around two-thirty, and upon entering the house, he found the rancher's widow sitting by the fireplace with a glass of wine, waiting for him.


She quietly called him over to her.

"Unbutton my blouse and take it off," she said.
Trembling, he did as she directed.

"Now take off my boots." He did as she asked, ever so slowly.

"Now take off my socks." He removed each gently and placed them neatly by her boots.

"Now take off my skirt." He slowly unbuttoned it, constantly watching her eyes in the fire light.

"Now take off my bra." Again, with trembling hands, he did as he was told and dropped it to the floor.


Then she looked deep into his eyes and said, "If you EVER wear my clothes into town again, you're fired"

(P.S. - I didn't see it coming either)

Report this post to a moderator | IP: Logged

Old Post 02-12-2020 02:11 PM
Driftwoodblue is offline Click Here to See the Profile for Driftwoodblue Click here to Send Driftwoodblue a Private Message Find more posts by Driftwoodblue Add Driftwoodblue to your buddy list Edit/Delete Message Reply w/Quote
arachyd
UKC Forum Member

Registered: Oct 2004
Location: NJ
Posts: 102

Ahahahahaha!

__________________
Gloria

Report this post to a moderator | IP: Logged

Old Post 02-12-2020 04:53 PM
arachyd is offline Click Here to See the Profile for arachyd Click here to Send arachyd a Private Message Find more posts by arachyd Add arachyd to your buddy list Edit/Delete Message Reply w/Quote
Redneck Mafia
UKC Moderator

Registered: Aug 2013
Location: Seneca, Mo
Posts: 5823

No I didn't see that coming LOL!
And I'm going to copy and paste to the humor thread here.

__________________
Cheyenne & Jennifer Cummings
Seneca , MO
(417)317-4815
"TEAM MAFIA"
*NATIONAL GRNITECH GRCH GRNITECH(5) HALL OF FAME PKC PLATIUM CH REDNECK BACKWOODS SHACK
2014 OK STATE CH, 2015 MO PKC LEADER, 2016 PKC NATIONALS SEMIFINALIST, 2016 UKC TOP 20, 2O17 UKC WORLD CHAMPIONSHIP 3RD PLACE, 2018 PKC SENIOR SHOWDOWN TRUCK HUNT FINAL 4, 2018 MO PKC STATE CHAMPION, 2019 AUTUMN OAKS NATIONAL GRNITE CH, 2019 PKC WORLD CH SEMIFINALIST. 2021 PKC SENIOR SHOWDOWN TRUCK HUNT FINAL 4.
*PKC WORLD CHAMPION PLATNIUM CHAMPION GRNITECH SHACK'S HEATHER ISLAND SOUTHERN STOGIE
2021 OKLAHOMA STATE CHAMPION, 2022 PKC WORLD CHAMPION, 2022 MO PKC STATE LEADER PRO SPORT TRUCK WINNER

RIP
*GRNITECH PKC SCH REDNECK MAFIA PKC HALL OF FAME REPRODUCER INDUCTED 2022
*GRNITECH CH PKC SILVER CH REDNECK SHACK ATTACK aka TAC 2018 OKLAHOMA STATE CHAMPION, 2020 MO PKC STATE LEADER

Report this post to a moderator | IP: Logged

Old Post 02-12-2020 05:00 PM
Redneck Mafia is offline Click Here to See the Profile for Redneck Mafia Click here to Send Redneck Mafia a Private Message Click Here to Email Redneck Mafia Find more posts by Redneck Mafia Add Redneck Mafia to your buddy list Edit/Delete Message Reply w/Quote
bigtimberkennel
UKC Forum Member

Registered: Feb 2011
Location: Charleston, Il.
Posts: 9650

🤣🤣Not bad at all.

Report this post to a moderator | IP: Logged

Old Post 02-12-2020 05:43 PM
bigtimberkennel is offline Click Here to See the Profile for bigtimberkennel Click here to Send bigtimberkennel a Private Message Find more posts by bigtimberkennel Add bigtimberkennel to your buddy list Edit/Delete Message Reply w/Quote
All times are GMT. The time now is 06:49 AM. Post New Thread    Post A Reply
  Last Thread   Next Thread
Show Printable Version | Email this Page | Subscribe to this Thread


Forum Jump:
 

Forum Rules:
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not edit your posts
HTML code is OFF
vB code is ON
Smilies are ON
[IMG] code is ON
 
< Contact Us - United Kennel Club >

Copyright 2003-2020, United Kennel Club
Powered by: vBulletin Version 2.3.0
(vBulletin courtesy Jelsoft Enterprises Limited.)