Registered: Jun 2003
Location: Comer, Georgia
Posts: 4724

............pharmacist comes into the drugstore he works at, and sees this guy leaning heavily against the wall...........he askes the blonde on duty what's up with the guy against the wall??......she replies "well, he came in for some cough medicine, and we were out, so I gave him a whole bottle of laxative instead"..................................the pharmacist goes ballistic and says "you idiot!!!....you can't treat a cough with a laxative!!!!".................she replies "sure you can.....LOOK at him..............he's skeeered to cough!!!"..................lololol

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Registered: Jun 2003
Location: Troy Iowa
Posts: 2159

I was in our local farm supply store and this older gentleman was buying some kind of one way valve. He asked the employee how he was going to know which way the valve was one way. The employee told him to blow in one end and see if air would come out. So, this guy held it up to his mouth and blew. When he did, there was this 'toot' sound, but it didn't come from the valve. As everyone was chuckling, the employee said the he bet that he couldn't do that again, the old guy says, "You want to bet?" lol

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Good people do not need laws to act responsibly, while bad people will find a way around the laws (Plato)

Last edited by Tim MACHA on 08-19-2009 at 05:00 PM

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Registered: Apr 2008
Location: Reelsville , Indiana
Posts: 1124

There was a man in line at Walmart buying a bag of dog food for his two hounds. A woman in line behind him asks, "sir, do you have dogs at home?" At this point the man can't help himself. He replies, "No ma'am, I'm trying the Purina diet. You just fill up your pockets and when you get hungry, eat a few pieces of the dog food and your hunger goes away. It worked really well, I lost almost 50 pounds last time before it put me in the hospital. I had tubes coming out of every orfice and was in severe pain." The woman says, "My word, I don't think I would try that again then." The man replies, "Oh, no ma'am, I was sitting in the middle of the street licking my balls when a car hit me."

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Justin Haddon

Proud member of the Deer Creek Cartel

Founding Member of the BSKC. Making coon hunting great again.

Home of:

`PR` B$C Clifford (BoonexCopper)
`PR` Johnson Branch Stub (GitXCree)

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Registered: Feb 2006
Location: Camden, AR
Posts: 117

My sister had me crying the other day. She came over with her six month old datchund (weiner dog), and the suckers eye was swole shut and was the size of a cue ball. I asked her what happened, thinking maybe it got a stick poked in it's eye. She said he caught a rabbit in the yard and was trying to play with it, when the rabbit kind of stood up and was boxing the dogs head with its front paws. I had never heard of a dog getting beat up by a rabbit before but maybe this one is related to Bugs Bunny.

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Registered: Jul 2003
Location: Columbus, Ks
Posts: 5398

I had a good friend take his three year old grandson to Wal-Mart. In the checkout line the grandson was directly behind a lady with his nose about six inches from her rear. The grandson was a well spoken three year old and said," Pa Pa I smell poo poo". Not just one time but several times before the situation changed.

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Home Of:
Gr Nt Ch, Ch Natural Smokey River Irene a coondog (Mailes Bob X Nt Ch Utchman Blue Two)
Gr Nt Ch Natural Smokey River Flo UKC Top 20 placing 15th UKC World 2011, top 100 2014 (Rebel x Mailes Lil)


The Hounds I Enjoyed Hunting:
Dual Gr Natural Smokey River Rebel, A buddy of mine
Gr. Nt Natural Blue Echo ( Gr Nt Quail Ck Jimmy X Nt Ch Natural Blue Bell)
Gr Nt Smokey River Chief's Joe (JBS Chief X Gr Nt Jeans Ruby)
Gr. Nt. Ch. Natural Smokey River Lucy (Chief's Joe X Muggins)
And Many More

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Registered: Nov 2006
Location: Mayer, MN
Posts: 920

A co-worker told me this one about her nephew. She was at an Easter drama at the church her sister and brother in law go to. Since both of them were in the drama she sat with the kids. The place was full, everyone very focused with it being a high quality production. At the point of high drama and tension when the Roman soldiers are nailing Jesus to the cross the audience was quiet, some tearful. Her nephew busts out in a loud voice, "WHY IS DADDY KILLING JESUS?" Instantly folks were laughing hilariously. We heard this one at lunch and laughed a good one then I thought it over and realized there's some truth in it that the boy spoke out of his innocence. Think it over. He might have brought the point of the Easter story home to those who never thought on it from that angle.

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Registered: Mar 2008
Location: Western N.Y.
Posts: 4005

I was working on my mower the other day and i had to drain the gas. well the wife has this cute little white kitten and when i looked over the kitten was lapping up this gas, all of a sudden the cat goes crazy and starts bouncing of the garage walls round and round out the door and up the tallest tree in the yard right to the top and bails out, hits the ground with a terrible waap. Now when every woman within earshot says oh my god was it dead you simply say nah. " just ran out of gas".

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