Registered: Jul 2004
Location: Mt.Airy, N.C.
Posts: 3152

Poor Uncle Ned went to sit down;
He grunted and grunted and my, what a frown!
"What's the matter?" asked Auntie, " Are you ailin?"
"Oh," groaned Uncle Ned, "This old body's a failin."

Hurts my hands to open a door;
Got no teeth and my gums are sore.
My legs cramp, and my eyes are red;
I can't hear, and there's no hair on my head

Can't see very will without my specks;
When I turn my head, it hurts my neck.
On my arm is a great big bruise;
Can't hardly bend over to tie my shoes.

Arthritis in my back, sinus in my nose,
Knots on my fingers, and corns on my toes.
I'm skin and bones, with my cheeks sunk in;
When I close my mouth, my nose hits my chin!

My legs ache, and my feet go to sleep
When I move around, all my joints creak.
I take a cold in the slightest breeze;
The lumps on my legs are what's left of my knees.

Had about all the diseases you can name,
Everything's connected to an ache or pain.
I drag my feet across the floor;
Besides all else, people say I snore.

If there's anything more I'm supposed to take,
It had better hit me quick- or twill be too late!
But I'm not givin up-Noooo Ma'am!
I just thank the good Lord I'm as well as I am!

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Home of Mayberry Blueticks
Jhn. 3:30, "He must increase, but I must decrease."

Last edited by Craig Edwards on 01-13-2009 at 05:27 PM

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Registered: Jul 2008
Location:
Posts: 1310

Yep. I'd say right now I'm 32 going on 62. Or that's how it feels some days.

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In the beginning of a change, the Patriot is a scarce man, brave, hated and scorned. When his cause succeeds, however, the timid join him, for then it costs nothing to be a patriot."
-- Mark Twain

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Registered: Mar 2006
Location: Cabot, Arkansas
Posts: 742

All I need is one more eye and I'll be good. One sees distance the other sees up close. It's all that in between stuff that I keep missing. O and I work for... an eye Dr:-}}

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Debbie Killough
501-412-2760

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Registered: May 2008
Location: central Ia.
Posts: 661

LOL! My wife says that sounds like me! I guess one to many bull rides, and dumb things Ive done to my body over the years!

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Registered: Mar 2006
Location: Cabot, Arkansas
Posts: 742

Well, it's all good! Phil 3:21, and that's not Dr. Phil, says we'll be gettin a new, glorious body. I can't wait. I'm gettin me a good one this time. Hope yall are felling better:-} Especially Uncle Ned.

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'Tis so sweet to trust in Jesus!!!


Debbie Killough
501-412-2760

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Registered: Nov 2006
Location: Mayer, MN
Posts: 920

Two retired gentlemen both worked at the local Big Mart store. During a lull in the day one asked the other "How are you feeling after retiring?"

The guy said, "I have never felt worse, body aches, hard to sleep at night, worrying about my pension and my vison is getting worse, how about you?"

The other guy replied, " Oh I have been sleeping like a baby and feel like a little kid most of the time."

"No kidding, how is that, you must be near 80."

"Oh it's real simple, I wake up several times a night needing to pee. During the day I can hardly find a restroom quick enough and there are times when I just don't know the word for something."

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