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nitechamp bud
UKC Forum Member

Registered: Jun 2003
Location: Salem,Missouri
Posts: 4917

Jokes for the twisted individuals like me!!
















======
Chrys the wife

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Old Post 10-08-2006 06:36 AM
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nitechamp bud
UKC Forum Member

Registered: Jun 2003
Location: Salem,Missouri
Posts: 4917
















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Old Post 10-08-2006 06:37 AM
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StraightDrive
UKC Forum Member

Registered: Mar 2004
Location: Dobson NC
Posts: 2112

Thanks I needed that after a long night. LOL

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Old Post 10-08-2006 08:06 AM
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larrypoe
Banned

Registered: Jan 2006
Location: bronaugh,MO
Posts: 2595

Chrys, you never fail to crack me up. That Moses one is priceless.

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Old Post 10-08-2006 08:12 AM
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TJ RAYFIELD
UKC Forum Member

Registered: Jan 2005
Location: Decatur, TN
Posts: 834

the hair dryer is the best.

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Old Post 10-08-2006 01:19 PM
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owitt1936
UKC Forum Member

Registered: Sep 2006
Location: Cutler, Il.
Posts: 141

Chrys,

I liked them all. My wife thought the one about the cow with the pierced mammary glands was good. How's that for keeping it clean????

Tried to go hunting last night, & there was deer hunters camped out on the property next to my hunting spots at three different places so I just turned around & came home. It's that time of year again, when the GREAT WHITE HUNTERS hit the brush, looking for those ever ELUSIVE GOVERNMENT GOATS.

John

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Old Post 10-08-2006 01:58 PM
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nitechamp bud
UKC Forum Member

Registered: Jun 2003
Location: Salem,Missouri
Posts: 4917

Re: Chrys,

quote:
Originally posted by owitt1936
Tried to go hunting last night, & there was deer hunters camped out on the property next to my hunting spots at three different places so I just turned around & came home. It's that time of year again, when the GREAT WHITE HUNTERS hit the brush, looking for those ever ELUSIVE GOVERNMENT GOATS.

John


John I am NOT looking forward to all the Cityfied deer slayers moving in around here. Its a mess when they do. We never hunt during (firearm) deer season, b/c most of them are idiots about hounds.

I am glad yawl enjoyed the pics.
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Old Post 10-09-2006 12:08 AM
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walkercash
UKC Forum Member

Registered: Feb 2006
Location: Mason, Michigan
Posts: 3166

Nicework Chrys. I knew by the title I better get in here. lol

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Old Post 10-09-2006 12:12 AM
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nitechamp bud
UKC Forum Member

Registered: Jun 2003
Location: Salem,Missouri
Posts: 4917

I'm truley surprised its not deleted yet. There are so many uptight people that like to turn others in to the mods for any little ol' thang.
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Old Post 10-09-2006 12:20 AM
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BIGCASTLEDAWGS
UKC Forum Member

Registered: Mar 2006
Location: Massachusetts
Posts: 19374

LOL....

... They must be AWAY this weekend....
The other twisted one, AnkleBiter

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Old Post 10-09-2006 12:21 AM
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nitechamp bud
UKC Forum Member

Registered: Jun 2003
Location: Salem,Missouri
Posts: 4917

AB you feeling any better, or are you still being a lazyazz?
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Old Post 10-09-2006 12:24 AM
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BIGCASTLEDAWGS
UKC Forum Member

Registered: Mar 2006
Location: Massachusetts
Posts: 19374

Well Chrys...

... I just had another coke so I'm AWAKE for the moment but.. I DID NOTHING all DAY, basically! The boys and Bob got ALL the storage pods empty! For the first time in 3 or 4 years we are NOT PAYING FOR STORAGE!WooHooo! Brandon(16) and RIchard (19) are looking thru a box of "saved school papers" from brandonss third grade...LOL... mostly garbage but he just found the last birthday card and some stuff from just before his Mom died, so that was nice. Bob was all excited because HE found the box with all his guitar effect pedals and NO they did NOT have batteries left to rot in them...LOL.
As for the Lazyazz thing... unless they find a New chronic fatigue post concussion fatigue Happy Pill... I'll always feel lazy...LMAO... that'll never change.
Well, I think I'll go chew on the kids ankles for a while... the dogs got sick of me bugging them. By the way... I bet I am the ONLY moron on here tonight who is sitting...ON the FLOOR in front of their sons BIG B and T... because he wanted my seat...and gave me...the look.Not even thinking I simply slid down with the laptop...LOL... But hey, down here on the floor I have a Stuffy, a nylabone and a Squeaky Squirrel! SO.... I don't need to chew on ankles! WooHooo! No more bad day for me...LOL,
Heather

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Old Post 10-09-2006 12:34 AM
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nitechamp bud
UKC Forum Member

Registered: Jun 2003
Location: Salem,Missouri
Posts: 4917

Heres another twisted joke

As I walked down the busy sidewalk, knowing I was late for an important interview, my eye fell upon one of those unfortunate, homeless vagabonds that are found in every city these days.

Wearing what can only be describes as rags, carrying every worldly possession in two plastic bags, my heart was touched by
this persons condition.

Some people turned to stare. Others quickly looked away as if the sight would somehow contaminate them.

Recalling some long ago Sunday School admonition to "care for the sick, feed the hungry and clothe the naked," I was moved by some powerful inner urge to reach out to this unfortunate person.

Yes, where some people saw only rags, I saw a hidden beauty.
A small voice inside my head called out,

"Reach out, reach out!"

So I did..........







I get out of the hospital in about 3 months.

It would be nice to get a card or maybe a visitor.

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Old Post 10-09-2006 12:41 AM
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walkercash
UKC Forum Member

Registered: Feb 2006
Location: Mason, Michigan
Posts: 3166

Re: Heres another twisted joke

quote:
Originally posted by nitechamp bud



OMG!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!lol

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Shawn Wemple
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Whitey Dogs ROCK!!!
I use and recommend Kelley's K-Lights.

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Old Post 10-09-2006 01:04 AM
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nitechamp bud
UKC Forum Member

Registered: Jun 2003
Location: Salem,Missouri
Posts: 4917

Re: Re: Heres another twisted joke

quote:
Originally posted by walkercash
OMG!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!lol


I bet I know what your doing and you will go blind. LMAO!!!

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Old Post 10-09-2006 01:09 AM
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walkercash
UKC Forum Member

Registered: Feb 2006
Location: Mason, Michigan
Posts: 3166

Re: Re: Re: Heres another twisted joke

quote:
Originally posted by nitechamp bud
I know what your doing and you will go blind. LMAO!!!
LMFAO, but no there just isnt enough "skin" showing for that.

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Shawn Wemple
Lost Creek Kennel
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Whitey Dogs ROCK!!!
I use and recommend Kelley's K-Lights.

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Old Post 10-09-2006 01:11 AM
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wvhounds
UKC Forum Member

Registered: Jun 2003
Location: "The Mountain State" Where it's uphill both ways!
Posts: 3127

lmao

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Old Post 10-09-2006 01:17 AM
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BIGCASTLEDAWGS
UKC Forum Member

Registered: Mar 2006
Location: Massachusetts
Posts: 19374

BOYS!

What ever happend to IMAGINATION! You Younguns have grown up with TOO much skin showing all the time... You've been ruined! LOL!
Well, My hero just got to see me in GirlieGirl mode... ONLY a spider will reduce me to that. I guess I'll share... I just got out of the shower a few minutes ago, am about to get dressed, see a little arm waving outta the corner of my eye, OUT OF BOBs beard trimmer...Fattest grossest greenish yellow house spider...It's Reaching out towards Richards toothbrushes, I BOLDLY and BRAVELY reach out to move them... I then SHREIK for Bob...who comes up and attempts to squish the Monster, it crawls INTO the trimmer... he takes it apart... and squishes it with a POP! GAG!!!!! Then he turns Grinning and says... that I was standing there naked doing the girliegirl Ewwwwwh! hand wave.... I feel like a A$$! I made his night! LOL.... ONLY a spider! Thank goodness he was home...I would have set the room on fire or something to kill it!
Have a Lovely Night! Hope some of you get out to hunt!
Heather

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Old Post 10-09-2006 01:25 AM
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nitechamp bud
UKC Forum Member

Registered: Jun 2003
Location: Salem,Missouri
Posts: 4917

If big-boobed women work at Hooters,



Where do one legged women work?
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You're going to love this
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====
Chrys the wife

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