UKC Forums - "Dear Mr. Elvis"

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-- "Dear Mr. Elvis" (http://forums.ukcdogs.com/showthread.php?threadid=928428684)

Posted by Kler Kry on 09-08-2015 11:32 PM:

"Dear Mr. Elvis"

It occurred to me that in this time of expensive dog feed that if we had someone that could predict the future then it would save alot of money on feed. If I knew which of my dogs to keep and meet my expectations it would save me countless dollars, physical stress, and mental fatigue.

Mr. Marv predicted Penney's success in 7/2013. I see that he also predicted Mr. Brian Whitten's success numerous times.

If Mr. Elvis had a Web site or a newspaper column like "Dear Abby" or " Dear Ann Landers" that I could contact for advice I'd be willing to pay with credit card, check or colby cheese to save money on my dog feed and I'd get more sleep as well.

What do you think? Can we convince Mr. Elvis to start a web site or column to help us out? What would be a fair price for his advice? I'd be willing to pay two bags of dog feed per answer.

Posted by Night Shift on 09-08-2015 11:45 PM:

Dear Mr Elvis
My wife says I spend to much time running my dogs. How do I show her that life would not be complete if I didn't have my coon hounds.

Posted by sleepy head on 09-08-2015 11:53 PM:

Dear Mr Elvis, my family complains I'm always tired after hunting late, they even call me a sleepy head, what should I do?

Posted by yadkintar on 09-09-2015 12:15 AM:

Dear mr Elvis I have a strained relationship with my hunting partner she won't listen to me . She makes me walk long distances when I don't want to I think she is trying to get me in shape so I appeal to her more . She often barks when I don't get her pen wetted down good enough to keep her cool when I feed her if I don't give her the treat first she gets moody. My wife claims she is her dog and she will never leave. I think they talk about me when I am not around.what should I do ?

Posted by David Webb on 09-09-2015 12:18 AM:

Mr. Elvis ?

Congratulations Mr. Risley on your Grand Slam Win

Marv, Please predict that a old man like me might have another good coon dog someday
!!! Thanks again for letting me & Dennis visit !!!
David

__________________
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Posted by elvis on 09-09-2015 02:34 AM:

quote:
Originally posted by Night Shift
Dear Mr Elvis
My wife says I spend to much time running my dogs. How do I show her that life would not be complete if I didn't have my coon hounds.

I will do a test respond to one question free, and then we will wait for feedback to see if my advice is worth anything.
At that time a decision will be made to either further pursue this career and what the fee will be, or go back to being a couch potato.The end decision will be yours, the viewer.

Dear Mr Nite Shift
This is indeed a serious situation, but I firmly believe that if you do exactly as I say, I can solve the problem.
Do not hunt for 2 weeks. During this time do not shower, do not shave, and never, I said Never, flush the toilet.
Do eat lots of food that makes you gassy.Do complain about anything and everything and above all, encourage your dogs to bark a lot in the kennel at the times they would normaly be hunting.
After the2 week period I predict she will be more supportive of your coonhunting addiction.
Good Luck
Sincerely
Mr. Elvis

Posted by jbk on 09-09-2015 02:48 AM:

Now that's funny right there and it will probably work

Posted by Rob Fry on 09-09-2015 02:59 AM:

Dear Mr. Elvis... Long time reader first time typerr.. What should I do with these black and tan puppies PAC is full of ? I did not want her bred and it was done behind my back ? .. Iam very hatful inside and Russ and Allan don't have anything for me to hunt at this time... Please if you can find a way to solve both my problems, I will be grateful.. My wife is at this time looking for a ceiling fan and has a extention cord in her hand as we speak.. Any help or briberey will help...lol

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Posted by Rob Fry on 09-09-2015 03:20 AM:

O and please put me down for a male pup out of the " outsider"

Posted by Mark V. on 09-09-2015 03:27 AM:

Dear MR. ELVIS do you need a manager or a Booking agent

Posted by NiteRageLink on 09-09-2015 03:39 AM:

1-800-ELVIS

If we could come up with the funds I think the best thing to do would be to get Elvis his own TV show. It could be like Long Island Medium but we could call it The Coondog Medium and maybe get a hotline going for fans to call Elvis for readings after the show lol.

All laughs aside I love reading Elvis' posts and listening to what he has to say. I think if someone just spent a day with him with a tape recorder in their pocket the intel and history you'd have would be priceless and I'd bet you could use it for future reference to find the answer to your questions.

Rob Fry, I'll get ya on that list for an Outsider pup.

Posted by Rob Fry on 09-09-2015 03:51 AM:

Re: 1-800-ELVIS

quote:
Originally posted by NiteRageLink
If we could come up with the funds I think the best thing to do would be to get Elvis his own TV show. It could be like Long Island Medium but we could call it The Coondog Medium and maybe get a hotline going for fans to call Elvis for readings after the show lol.

All laughs aside I love reading Elvis' posts and listening to what he has to say. I think if someone just spent a day with him with a tape recorder in their pocket the intel and history you'd have would be priceless and I'd bet you could use it for future reference to find the answer to your questions.

Rob Fry, I'll get ya on that list for an Outsider pup.

Thanks... Marv knows his stuff and has been playing with the big boys for years..... I have know him forever but he still hasn't excepted my " friend request " on Facebook....lol

Posted by Robert Johnson on 09-09-2015 12:59 PM:

quote:
Originally posted by elvis

Elvis you must be practicing to be a divorce court lawyer. you did forget just one thing, leave the toilet seat up! lol
I will do a test respond to one question free, and then we will wait for feedback to see if my advice is worth anything.
At that time a decision will be made to either further pursue this career and what the fee will be, or go back to being a couch potato.The end decision will be yours, the viewer.

Dear Mr Nite Shift
This is indeed a serious situation, but I firmly believe that if you do exactly as I say, I can solve the problem.
Do not hunt for 2 weeks. During this time do not shower, do not shave, and never, I said Never, flush the toilet.
Do eat lots of food that makes you gassy.Do complain about anything and everything and above all, encourage your dogs to bark a lot in the kennel at the times they would normaly be hunting.
After the2 week period I predict she will be more supportive of your coonhunting addiction.
Good Luck
Sincerely
Mr. Elvis

__________________
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Posted by bowling on 09-09-2015 02:07 PM:

quote:
Originally posted by Robert Johnson

night shift he is exactly right I quit for a month one time sold all my dogs and equipment my wife offered to buy the best hound available and all my equipment back . Got way better dog back than I sold and new equipment no problems since then. She even bought me a new garmin when I complained I needed one cause my buddies did. Loll

Posted by Richard Lambert on 09-12-2015 02:45 PM:

quote:
Originally posted by elvis
This is indeed a serious situation, but I firmly believe that if you do exactly as I say, I can solve the problem.
Do not hunt for 2 weeks. During this time do not shower, do not shave, and never, I said Never, flush the toilet.
Do eat lots of food that makes you gassy.Do complain about anything and everything and above all, encourage your dogs to bark a lot in the kennel at the times they would normaly be hunting.
After the2 week period I predict she will be more supportive of your coonhunting addiction.

Marv, is that what you did? Mr Shift, have you tried Elvis's advice yet?

Posted by Ricochet17 on 09-13-2015 07:12 PM:

Mr Elvis, we both have this friend that just won a inaugural event and so it seems he forgot to thank a certain BLUE dog that made Penney the dog that she is and went on to give her that competitive edge with routine pleasure hunting. What can I do to have him be honest with himself?

Signed lonely Meadow Valley blue dog.

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Posted by DOUG CHEEK on 09-14-2015 01:31 PM:

DEAR ELVIS ----While hunting last night old BLUE rolled in a dead cow --now my wife will not let BLUE sleep with us in our bed --BLUE always sleeps with us ---do U think she is being unreasonable -----

PS ----she said she just put clean sheets on the bed a couple months ago ---

signed yours truly------------ sleeping on the couch with BLUE

__________________
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ALWAYS GO BY THE RULES AND NEVER A PROBLEM

Posted by Kler Kry on 09-14-2015 06:30 PM:

Lonely in Meadow Valley

quote:
Originally posted by Ricochet17
Mr Elvis, we both have this friend that just won a inaugural event and so it seems he forgot to thank a certain BLUE dog that made Penney the dog that she is and went on to give her that competitive edge with routine pleasure hunting. What can I do to have him be honest with himself?

Signed lonely Meadow Valley blue dog.

Penney and I very much appreciate the friendship of Duane and Yodeler(blue) and that is why he got pick of her litter. It is my understanding that the 8 month old pup is breaking trail for blue in appreciation of past favors.

Thanks to UKC dog registration and DNA tests which makes it possible for a serious breeder to identify where the traits are coming from and concentrate them in the offspring.

Posted by Ricochet17 on 09-15-2015 03:26 AM:

I might have to find some blue spray paint for the young dog. I've gotten to like him a little bit.

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