UKC Forums (http://forums.ukcdogs.com/index.php)
- UKC Coonhounds (http://forums.ukcdogs.com/forumdisplay.php?forumid=4)
-- Have to read about women !!!!!!!!! If you dare LOL (http://forums.ukcdogs.com/showthread.php?threadid=67730)

Have to read about women !!!!!!!!! If you dare LOL

WOMAN'S PERFECT BREAKFAST
She's sitting at the table with her gourmet coffee.

Her son is on the cover of the Wheaties box.
Her daughter is on the cover of Business Week.
Her boyfriend is on the cover of Playgirl.
And her husband is on the back of the milk carton.



WOMEN'S REVENGE
"Cash, check or charge?" I asked, after folding items the woman wished to purchase.
As she fumbled for her wallet I noticed a remote control for a television set in her purse.
"So, do you always carry your TV remote?" I asked.
"No," she replied, " but my husband refused to come shopping with me,
and I figured this was the most evil thing I could do to him legally."


UNDERSTANDING WOMEN
(A MAN'S PERSPECTIVE)
I know I'm not going to understand women.
I'll never understand how you can take boiling hot wax,
pour it onto your upper thigh, rip the hair out by the root, and still be afraid of a spider.





MARRIAGE SEMINAR
While attending a Marriage Seminar dealing with communication,
Tom and his wife Grace listened to the instructor,
"It is essential that husbands and wives know each other's likes and dislikes."
He addressed the man,
"Can you name your wife's favorite flower?"
Tom leaned over, touched his wife's arm gently and whispered, "It's Pillsbury, isn't it?


CIGARETTES AND TAMPONS
A man walks into a pharmacy and wanders up and down the aisles.
The sales girl notices him and asks him if she can help him.
He answers that he is looking for a box of tampons for his wife.
She directs him down the correct aisle.
A few minutes later, he deposits a huge bag of cotton
balls and a ball of string on the counter.
She says, confused, "Sir, I thought you were looking for some tampons for your wife?
He answers, " You see, it's like this,
yesterday, I sent my wife to the store to get me a carton of cigarettes,
and she came back with a tin of tobacco and some rolling
papers; cause it's sooo-ooo--oo-ooo much cheaper.
So, I figure if I have to roll my own so does she.
( I figure this guy is the one on the milk carton! )


WIFE VS. HUSBAND
A couple drove down a country road for several miles, not saying a word.
An earlier discussion had led to an argument and
neither of them wanted to concede their position.
As they passed a barnyard of mules, goats, and pigs,
the husband asked sarcastically, "Relatives of yours?"
"Yep," the wife replied, "in-laws."


W O R D S
A husband read an article to his wife about how many words women use a day...
30,000 to a man's 15,000.
The wife replied, "The reason has to be because we have to repeat everything to men...
The husband then turned to his wife and asked, "What?"


CREATION
A man said to his wife one day, "I don't know how you can be
so stupid and so beautiful all at the same time.
" The wife responded, "Allow me to explain.
God made me beautiful so you would be attracted to me;
God made me stupid so I would be attracted to you!


WHO DOES WHAT
A man and his wife were having an argument about who
should brew the coffee each morning.
The wife said, "You should do it, because you get up first, and then we don't have to wait as long to get our coffee."
The husband said, " You are in charge of cooking around here and you should do it, because that is your job, and I can just wait for my coffee."
Wife replies, "No, you should do it, and besides, it is in the Bible that the man should do the coffee."
Husband replies, "I can't believe that, show me."
So she fetched the Bible, and opened the New Testament and showed him at the top of several pages, that it indeed says.........."HEBREWS"



The Silent Treatment
A man and his wife were having some problems at home and were giving each
other the silent treatment. Suddenly, the man realized that the next day,
he would need his wife to wake him at 5:00 AM for an early morning business flight.
Not wanting to be the first to break the silence (and LOSE), he wrote on a piece of paper,
"Please wake me at 5:00 AM." He left it where he knew she would find it.
The next morning, the man woke up, only to discover it was 9:00 AM
and he had missed his flight. Furious, he was about to go and
see why his wife hadn't wakened him, when he noticed a piece of paper by
the bed. The paper said, "It is 5:00 AM. Wake up."
Men are not equipped for these kinds of contests.



God may have created man before woman, but there is always a rough draft before the masterpiece.

__________________
Don't be SCARED it's just THUNDER NTCH GRCH"PR" SIR JACOBS STYLISH THUNDER

A BAD BOY BRUSSEL PUP

http://i110.photobucket.com/albums/n102/ntchthunder/03-07-20065.jpg

Ronnie Green 317-485-5564

I HUNT A BRUSSEL PUP

ROFLMAO !!!!!!!!! Oh Lordy ! Those are dang good. Thanks so very much for tha laughs. I actually laughed out loud !

lol

i'm a women as you already know but i have to say nice job all my women friends ejoyed them what made you come up with something like that?
or did you run across them somewere?

E-mail

I get most of the stuff from my e-mail. I like to share the good 1's

.............................................

Ronnie Green

__________________
Don't be SCARED it's just THUNDER NTCH GRCH"PR" SIR JACOBS STYLISH THUNDER

A BAD BOY BRUSSEL PUP

http://i110.photobucket.com/albums/n102/ntchthunder/03-07-20065.jpg

Ronnie Green 317-485-5564

I HUNT A BRUSSEL PUP

Roll her own...ROFLMAO REPEATEDLY!

__________________
Rip Acorn Creek Black Swamp Jester

In Honor of Jim Sizemore, " This ain't no benchshow!"

Nice post

__________________
Robbie Spears with
Prime Time English Kennels
606 454 2282

GRNITECHHOF PKC CHAMPION ‘PR' PRIME TIME OUTLAW JESSE JAMES HTX3
2019 6th Place UKC World Championship
2019 Purina Race National Leader

Fast is fine, but accuracy is everything!!!
–- Wyatt Earp

People accuse me of being color blind. The truth is I will hunt red ones, blue ones, black and white ones, yellow ones, black and tan ones, or even brindle ones; Just as long as they are English!

btt

I loved your post! Great job!

__________________
Blueblooded Girl!

lol about that
That was funny